Candy Hearts frontwoman Mariel Loveland spoke out on her Tumblr a couple of days ago where she accused Seaway’s tour manager of physical assault, as well as, emotional abuse while on tour. She explained why she didn’t say something then and how it’s affected her since.

It happened on tour in front of a line full of people at Seaway’s merch. He was screaming at me, like usual, calling me names and saying I wasn’t worth anything, like usual – that kind of stuff is awful and you should never allow someone to talk to you like that, but I did. For almost a year. I finally decided not to take it anymore. He was our tour manager too, and I was employing him (albeit not very much but he was the highest paid out of all of us) and he was still telling me horrible things every day. That’s when he got violent. He started throwing things at my head and pushed me, while screaming in my face. He winded me with the stuff he threw at my stomach and I screamed louder to draw attention to him, in the way you sort of are supposed to yell really loud to scare a bear that’s about to kill you. I tried to hit him back but he is massive. I pushed him and nothing happened. I spent the rest of the tour terrified.

I didn’t want to make a big deal about it after it happened. If I did, I knew he’d be removed from the tour and as much as I wanted him gone, I didn’t want seaway to have to go without someone running their merch in the middle of tour. I felt like everyone would blame me for his actions if I spoke up – oh Mariel you just know how to push people’s buttons – and some people did. Most of the very few people who knew what happened didn’t want to take sides – they said we’re both their friends. But the truth is when one friend tries to physically hurt another, smaller by 150+lbs friend, not taking sides means you’re saying abusing someone is ok. Not taking sides means you’ve taken a side and I continue to leave in fear and feel totally alone. People say if it’s true why didn’t I call the cops? I just wanted the whole thing to go away and I didn’t want to mess up things for seaway/other bands. It ruins a bands reputation to have conflict and I just wanted to tour and be able to continue to tour.

She goes on to ask:

tell me, why does no one stand up for the girls in our scene and make it almost impossible to stand up for ourselves? I’m not saying he should be fired from his job or that I want his life ruined. I’m saying he needs to be held accountable. He needs to seek help and know how he affected people. In an industry where we don’t have HR, we’re responsible for keeping it safe.

What bothers me most about this are the hate comments made throughout her post. It’s the haters like that who make speaking out against abuse nearly impossible for victims. That’s all I’m going to say about that. You can read her full post here.